The feelings start the night before. Your stomach suddenly starts fluttering when you remember that the next day is THE DAY. Then, you go through the rest of the night rather numbed. Finally, you go to sleep. You feel like you need sleep, but you just can't. You toss and turn, roll and fidget. Finally, you doze off.
The next morning, you wake up and are blissfully unaware for the first five to ten minutes. Then, as your mind gets more alert, reality hits you like a bucket of ice water in your face. THE DAY HAS COME!
The day passes slowly as you contemplate your upcoming performance.
The time comes to go into the hotel where you will perform for a TRAINED professional in music.
Will I be too nervous? Will I make a mistake that ruins my piece? Will my instrument have techinical problems?
One by one, these questions run through you mind. One by one, you mentally answer them and try to reassure yourself. Soon, you run out of questions and time. The time comes when it is time for you to enter the examination room. Your heart is beating a mixture of excitement and apprehesion. The door opens, you greet the examiner and get a greeting that is friendly, but not very reassuring.
The exam passes as blur in your head. You answer each question and play your pieces, scales, and arppegios mechanically. Finally, you are free to exit the room. The moment you pass the door, a wave of mixed reactions hit you. You feel relieved that you have finished the exam, you feel satisfied that you have done your best, BUT, you feel nervous. The nervousness comes from wondering if you did well enough. Sure, you did your best, but was it good enough?? This question irks you for the first few minutes. But, your results arrive only in three to four months. Over the next few hours, your trepidation is replaced by overwhelming relief and joy. Your face is a picture of contentment. The exam is OVER